dieses unsichtbare schild.

als ob es über meinem kopf schwebt.
als ob es auf meiner stirn steht.
als ob es um meinem hals liegt.

wie eine große wolke
 aus stinkendem gas.
mit einem dicken marker
wasserunslöslich.
mit einer kette.
aus schwerem metall.

die rauchigen buchstaben formen das wort.
die dicken striche aus tinte kreieren den ausdruck.
die einzelnen glieder bilden den sinn.

dreck oder prinzessin
schlampe oder elfe
gut oder böse

ich weiß es nicht,
der spiegel mag es nicht verraten.

unloveable.

Oh ...
I know I'm unloveable
You don't have to tell me
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours
Oh ...

I know I'm unloveable
You don't have to tell me
Oh, message received
Loud and clear
Loud and clear
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours


I know I'm unloveable
You don't have to tell me
For message received
Loud and clear
Loud and clear
Message received
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours


I wear Black on the outside
'Cause Black is how I feel on the inside
I wear Black on the outside
'Cause Black is how I feel on the inside


And if I seem a little strange
Well, that's because I am
If I seem a little strange
That's because I am


But I know that you would like me
If only you could see me
If only you could meet me


Oh ...
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours
Mmm ...
Oh ... 

this cig.

it's lit.
glowing.
smoldering.
there.
red.
and orange.
and baking.

sonntagmorgens.

die beats der nacht noch im kopf.
dröhnend.
laut.

und ohne halt.

vom glücklich sein.

nur kurz hält es an.
wie ein sturm überkommt es mich.
nur kurz hält es an.
gedanken kreisen um sich.
nur kurz hält es an.
das warme gefühl.
die wohlige stimmung.
alles andere als kühl.
sie baut sich auf - die erwartung.
aber nur kurz hält es an.
und wie es begann
so entschwann
es mir.

sylvia.

I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell’s fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan’s men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you’d return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead;
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

Mad girls love song. Sylvia Plath

trashbin.

... and i wasted

- time
- money
- feelings like love and hate
- my body and the ones from others

so... i wasted like a lot.

could u pick up the bin and throw it all away?

please.